Thursday, August 14, 2008

I've Been to Paradise, but I've Never Been To Me...

So lately I have heard this a lot, "I think you need a break". A break? A BREAK? What is this word you speak of, break? A break from what, may I ask? A break from being pregnant for the past two years? A break from having two boys still in diapers? Or do I need a break from lack of sleep, could that be it? Perhaps I need a break from having nothing in my closet now but maternity clothes? I don't know, maybe I need a break from not being the only one in the bathroom while I pee. Oh wait, I know what it is, I need a break from having a proper meal, right?
No, no, no, I need a break from all the vacations I take. Damn, Mexico is getting so mundane. You know what, it must be a break from all the heavy diamonds I wear - geesh these things bring me down, eh?
I think, in reality, what I need a break from is other people thinking my time is not as valuable as theirs. You know what I am talking about. People who come and go as they please in your life because well, you don't have crap going on anyway... Those who are under the impression that a SAHM sits around eating bon-bons and watching her "stories" all day. The fine folks, whether they be friends or relatives that make plans with you and TOTALLY FORGET ABOUT THEM after you have gotten up at 5am (after going to bed at 3) to clean your house, clean your children, clean the dogs, make sure angry children have eaten, beaten them into submission (kidding) so they don't embarrass you, tried to comb your hair and USE A HAIR DRYER because only your kids are used to seeing what a scary creature you resemble. Look, I do not have a maid or a nanny, and I do all of this alone for over eight hours. I have a newborn and a 19 month old - this is WORK, people. If you are coming over to my home that's great, superb, fine, lovely, dandy, can't wait to see you. But if you cancel on me TWICE, I may have to reconsider the next time you "plan" to see me and I get up at the crack of dawn to accomodate your visit. I actually went to the trouble of trimming my bush (stop it, Lotus, uh-huh I KNOW you) outside so you would not get whacked in the face by a rogue tree branch. And let me tell you something, I received quite a nasty wound from this gardening I did. Yeah! And you know what else, the time I spent cleaning the damn house is time I could have spent with my kids, because, well, I have to stash them somewhere so I can actually get something accomplished, and, yeah, I was going somewhere with this but I've lost it. The sun is about to come up.
I think I need a break.


Anonymous said...

dear lord, i hope no family reads THIS one

Mary said...

Amen, sister! I think I'll leave this for my husband to read - sometimes I'm not sure he understand how busy a day is with 2 school-aged kids and a baby. Oh yeah, and I'm trying to start a new at-home career! I suggest you not go out of your way next time this person tries to make plans. Just let them see you in all your mommy glory!